Coaching is Easy Right?

Coaching is so much more than volunteering a few hours here and there. If you are truly passionate about it, it requires research, studying, planning, observing, education, and a whole lot of trial and error.

I came into coaching very naive with grandiose ideas. Not the best combination, but I think many young coaches come into the profession the same way. I had been a competitive gymnast for 14 years so really, how hard could coaching be right? I had grand ideas of coming in, having a lot of fun, and of course winning... no problem.

My first meet as a coach was a life lesson and it molded me into the coach I was for 20 years. I coached young athletes (most were 6-7 yrs old) who were just beginning their journey as competitive gymnasts. It was my first competition as a coach and their first competition as an athlete and they were darling. They were in their new team uniforms with their hair all up and cute with sparkles and bows. They were ready to go. I was a nervous mess because I was now on the coaching side of things and it was brand new territory for me.

We started our balance beam rotation and the girls started competing. They did their routines and as their scores came up my heart started to sink. The scores were bad. And I don't mean kind of bad. I mean HORRIBLE BAD!!! Fortunately the kids and parents were new to this whole competition thing and they did not understand how poor the scores really were. I was devastated.

After the competition the athletes were not in tears but I was. I knew I had failed the kids, failed the program, and failed myself. My sister had been coaching for a few years and she had known what going to happen before it all played out that day. With tears I asked her why she let me go out there and look like a fool? Her answer was very simple. She said, "You needed to learn somehow." At first I was very angry with this answer, but eventually I was able to step back and realize how selfless she was and how much belief she truly had in me. She knew I was not going to be content with the team I put out there for all to see. She knew I would go into the gym with a desire to be a better leader for those little girls who trusted me to teach them. She knew I would study and study to learn all I could about the skills I was teaching. She knew I wasn't going to be content being less than okay or even just okay. I doubted myself the whole season, but we made it through and finished third at the state meet. It was then I realized I had the ability to coach, I had fun doing it, and I could possibly help create a successful program.

We still laugh at the story from time to time. What do I appreciate most about what my sister did? She allowed me to learn on my own. She allowed me to fail. She was willing to let people look at the program and think," Wow! That lady has no idea what she is doing." My sister could have taken over, told me everything to do, and given me step by step instructions. She could have saved me from the frustration of the first competition, but then she would have also taken away the lesson. What she did was allow me to make my own path. She did not make it for me. It took some time, but I eventually found my own way and twenty years later I can look back fondly at the path I took and the program we created. I can look back on my coaching career and have little regret.

Not long into my coaching career, I learned there are many roles a coach has to fulfill on a daily basis. If you are not interested in taking on these roles, you should reconsider coaching as a profession.

I think most obvious is you will be a teacher. Not only will you teach technique, skills, and rules, but you have the privilege and opportunity to teach life lessons. As a teacher of skills, you learn the mechanics of the skill and come up with a plan to help the athlete achieve those skills. You study ways to teach the same skill and figure out which one works by trial and error. There will be times you will come up with your own methods and they will work too. Life lessons present themselves all the time. A teammates injury, a big loss, a big win, getting cut from a team, making a team and your best friend doesn't, and things that happen in life outside of sport like divorce or death. As a coach, you have to be prepared to handle it all.

You become a counselor. Some kids find sport is their only safe space. Things go on at home and they need an outlet. Sport provides that outlet and coaches often times provide that listening ear. When you become the adult they turn to, you have to be very careful of your involvement and do not allow the child to become overly dependent on you. If you feel something needs to be addressed with the parent, bring it to their attention and offer to be part of the discussion with the child. You help them through many of life's ups and downs without even realizing it. You get to help your athlete work through a bad practice, a bad game or competition, a bad day at school, or even a break up with a boy or girlfriend. You get to be part of that learning process and it is such an honor. Be open to conversations but remember to maintain boundaries.

Without realizing it, you become a child development specialist. It is important to know what developmental stage your athlete is in. You must also realize each athlete will develop at a different rate. Look at a group of seventh grade boys. One child may be 5'10" and another is 4'1" because they are developing at a different speed. You have to take into account not only the physical, but the emotional and mental development of each child as well. Coaches have to be cognizant of the changes the athlete's body is going through during puberty as well. Understand the child does not know what is going on with their body and they may struggle with something that was once easy. Be patient with them. Puberty is hard enough without your coach getting frustrated about it too.

With sport comes injury unfortunately. It is always best to be first aid certified because you will become a nurse/doctor at some time during your coaching career. Band aids are easy. When it comes to to something a little more serious like a broken arm that is disfigured, you need to know how to handle the situation without adding stress to the athlete. When an athlete sees or feels your panic, they will follow suit and they will become more uneasy. Make sure you have a plan when such an injury occurs. Know who will make the 911 call, know who will stabilize the injury, know who will call the parents, and know who will be best at keeping the athlete calm. Every injury will resolve with less stress if there is a plan.

I went into coaching with the mindset I would simply coach. I came out knowing how to pull teeth, do hair, calm injured athletes, write lesson plans, organize and design practice schedules, communicate with many different types of people, and learned a lot of life lessons. I learned every parent is worried about their own child, but as a coach, you have to worry about all of them. It is like being a nervous mom of 50 kids. And in all honesty, there is no better job in the world!

If your decision to coach is based on winning being the only objective, then you are missing out on the most amazing parts of coaching. You are missing out on the relationships, the opportunities to learn from others, and the opportunities to help others. Coaching has given me the greatest joy. It has made me a better person, a more understanding person, and a more compassionate person. Easy though? No, not at all, but definitely worth it.